Arrivederci

Saying goodbye is never easy for me. Last weekend I traveled alone to my family home to help pack it up and say goodbye. With my video camera in hand I walked through the house and yard telling stories of my childhood memories while fighting back without much success many tears. I also left a note on my old bedroom wall for the new owners. The new owners are in their mid thirties and have a young daughter. I also found out the mother will be starting a balloon business in my fathers old shop. The thought of this young family moving in and starting to create their own memories made me feel a tad bit better.

I made it through a very tough weekend. It was nice to come back home to my boys eagerly awaiting my arrival. We enjoyed a nice quite Thanksgiving together. I learned that my memories will always be with me regardless of where my parents are living.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone. Despite having to let go of so much this week I have an awful lot to be thankful for - and I am.

Going Home

I will be heading to my parents house this weekend to help them pack. I will be bringing my camera and my video camera with me. I plan on walking through the house and yard documenting as much of it as I can. This will be the last time I have access to the house.

My emotions are a wreck. My levels of stress and anxiety have been high this week. The stress of the moving logistics, the anxiety of saying goodbye to my house and most of all the double anxiety of leaving my family here for the first time ever.

The only time I left Enzo was when I was hospitalized for a week while pregnant with Sal. Sal is 18 months now but I have not left him yet. I am so sad to leave them. I know JB will be fine (especially because his mother will be here) but I just don't like the thought of not hugging them each night. I know this trip will be good for me in so many ways. I will be staying with a friend of mine at night so I will have a chance to unwind a bit and have some girl time.

Wish me safe travels and strength so I can get through this weekend.

Woman kicked off Burlington Flight for Breastfeeding

Read the story here.

I hope Freedom Airlines (Delta) gets blasted for this one.

When will the American culture change? It is acceptable for the female body to be exposed as long as it is for the pleasure of a man. If a boob is seen as anything else the people suddenly feel offended as the stewardess of this airline said. Offended because someone won't cover up their babies head while nursing? Aren't there more offensive things to get in a tizzy about? Pornography, Hooters, strip clubs, excessive violence against women, global warming, the war in Iraq, President Bush, gun control - I mean come on now.

I have had enough.

Holding on

This is old picture of Elm Street. Back when Elm trees lined the street. Before pavment, before traffic. The house on the left is the house my mother grew up in. The house I grew up in in two house down from it. My grandparent owned all three houses on the left until my parents bought one from them. My grandfather (Salvatore) died when I was in highschool. When my grandmother died three years ago the other two houses were sold. My house was the last one. Two more weeks and it will be gone. Another family is waiting to move in and start their own memories. I don't know if they have children or not. I like to think they do. Perhaps 30 years from now their children will be looking at pictures of this old street - reliving their own memories, holding on to their past with a tear in their eye.

goodbye sweet elm

Sorry I have been away so long. I left my job as a project manager one year ago and here I find myself managing the most stressful and emotional project of my life.

I have posted a few times over the past few months about how my parents have our family home up for sale. It is the house I grew up in and it is on a street called Elm street where for the past 60 years my family members have lived. Our house, this generation is the last to occupy this old street where Elm trees once lined the sidewalks on either side of the street.

After being on the market for almost a year they received an offer last week. This is good for many reasons. The house is now too big for them to take care of. My father is not working anymore so it is also a strain on them financially. The crazy part to all of this is they have to be out in three weeks. Now we are talking about two people who have lived in this house for I will guess close to 34 years. Even after my sister and I moved out our old rooms and closets are still filled with our stuff we chose not to take with us when we move out. Luckily I went down in May and cleaned out most of what I had left there.

So being the farthest away I have been given the job of project manager (fitting). It is good because it makes me feel like I am doing something to help since I can't be there physically every day. I am going down for one weekend to help empty the house out before the movers come. With all the craziness of phone calls and planning I have not really had time to digest that my house is selling. Next weekend when I go down it will be the last time I ever see it. I can't go down again for the closing.

In so many ways I know I am lucky. Most everyone I know lost their family home long ago or some never even knew one. I know I am lucky but it still makes it hard. I am a very sentimental person. I even debated buying it so many times. It came at the wrong time because I just bought my house a year ago. Also, I wonder if I would have been buying it for the wrong reasons. I always swore I would never move back to that town. It is amazing how things change. They will be moving in with my sister in another town for now, until we find them a place to go. There is a good chance they will not be moving back to Milford. This means saying goodbye to a whole lot more than just my house. Saying goodbye to a town my great great grandparents from Italy chose to come to at the ripe age of 18.

So I will bid a farewell to the three generations of my family living on Elm Street. Goodbye sweet house, goodbye backyard, goodbye to all the secret forts we built, fairies I played with, trees I climbed, hills I sledded on. It was more than shelter. It was a place filled with love and adventures, family gatherings, fights, celebrations and grief. A place of first loves, breakups and friendship.

farewell.

Happy Halloween

Lockdown

My kid had his first lockdown drill today. He is in freakin' preschool! If you don't know - lockdown is what schools now practice incase there is a potential school shooting or other act of violence against a school. On one hand I am happy they are doing this considering we just had a school shooting a few months ago. On the other hand reality hit me when we were told this morning they would be having their first drill. Has it really come to this?

The room is to remain locked and the children are brought to a "safe" part of the room, lights are turned off and the children are taught to stay calm and quite. I showed up at the time it was supposed to be over and the Halloween party was to begin. I walked right in the building and right in the preschool room - both of which should have been locked but I thought the drill was over. Well it wasn't. Apparently the person walking around the school to make sure everyone was doing the drill properly unlocked the preschool door to go in and left in unlocked when he left. Dumbass.

Wow I feel safe now.

little pumpkins

We went pumpkin picking last weekend. To a spot we have been going to since Enzo was about three weeks old.

Giving Thanks

Today I asked Enzo what he was thankful for this Thanksgiving season.

His response was

"I'm thankful I am still a kid."


I am so thankful for him.

Big News!

Big news today!

I am in the local newspaper called Seven Days. They did an article on Vermont fashion and interviewd the owner of the store Made Boutique & Gallery where I sell my jewelry.

Check it out.

Seven Days article

New Etsy Shop Address

My etsy shop had my old business name so I just finished setting up my new shop.

If you used to visit purpleelm.etsy.com that store is now closed.

My new Etsy shop is subsixstudios.etsy.com

Stop by for a visit.

If you had my old shop bookmarked or listed on your blog please change it if you can.

1st day of preschool

Enzo started preschool today. It was such a big day for both of us. He grew up in daycare and preschool but he has been home with me full time for the past year so it was a big transition for both of us. We were both so nervous for such different reasons. I am glad I have had this past year home with him. I feel like I got a chance to know him a lot better. He just turned 5 and missed the cut off for Kindergarden so I was hoping I could find something for him this year. We were able to find a wonderful place that we could afford. Three days a week/ two hours a day. He desperately needs some social interaction. He went from all day daycare to being home with me full time. It has been wonderful but I don't know anyone with kids his age so I do feel like he has been missing out on that part of it.

I dropped him off rather quickly to make for a better transition but those old feelings of guilt hit me like a ton of bricks. This time the new fear of schools in general because of all the recent school violence left me with many new anxieties. We both made it through and he was so happy when I picked him up. They even celebrated his birthday today. He told me he thought the place was "really cool."

Birthday Boy

My sweet boy Enzo turns 5 years old today. He is an absolute angel in my life. He was born exactly two years to the day that I miscarried my first child. Life is a full circle I believe.

He has grown so much over the past five years. He has always been a very independent child. Smart beyond his years. He has the best of both sides of JB and I (and some of the worst). He is a good mixture of art and music with the love of science and math and learning about the world around him. He loves books. Most recently we have been reading him the Larua Ingalls Wilder series. The past month he decided he wanted to play chess so he had JB teach him. JB has been trying to get me to play chess for 6 years and it just hasn't happened yet. Chess has never sunk in for me. Take my five year old though, teach him the rules and he and JB now play every night before bed. They have routine down. They play chess for a certain amount of time and then read. He amazes me.

He is becoming everything I wish he could become and more. I wish the world for him. I wish for health and peace him. I wish for him knowledge and joy.

Happy Birthday my sweet boy. I love you so much.

Exciting News!

The boutique where I have been selling my jewelry now has an online store.
Made Boutique & Gallery
Some of my jewelry plus other wonderful indie artists can now be purchased online.

she is offering FREE SHIPPING during the month of October!


Thanks Sara.

Identity crisis

I am going through an online identity crisis. There are just too many blogs, websites and myspace pages to update in one day. I currently have this blog, one specifically for my jewelry, my My Space page and a natural parenting/birthing website

I can't take it anymore. I need to combine some of these somehow to make life easier. I have been keeping my creative life and my parenting life seperate but do they have to be? They coexist together in my life at home so why not here.

So be on the look out for some changes. I am not sure what yet but one of these days two worlds might become one.

Harvest Moon

harvest moon is the full moon that occurs closest to the date of the autumn equinox in the Northern Hemisphere.

Harvest time is here. I love this time of the year. I love getting my yard ready for the upcoming winter months. I love fall vegetables, making chili and soup, drinking apple cider and crunching around in the leaves with my kids. Fall is a great time to get outside and into your community. It seems like the one time that most towns and cities offer a variety of community events. Harvest festivals, apple picking and Halloween events fill our newspaper. I wish I could do them all. This is the time of year for slowing down.

Being a vegetarian and whole foods advocate I tend to shop mostly at my local coop and farmers market. I am lucky to live in a state that has many wonderful local organic farms to buy from. Through our local farmers market all summer and fall and at our coop market in the winter months there is almost no reason to not get my produce there. Especially now. With the recent E Coli outbreak on the CA spinach I feel it is more of a reason to buy local and inseason produce as much as you can. Not only are locally grown vegetables healthier (they contain more vitamins and minerals because you are eating them at their freshest point) but they are also safer.

There is also something to be said for how people used to eat seasonal foods. People didn't have the option to eat lettuce in the winter months if they lived in a cold climate. Today however we are so used to going to the grocery store and buying what we want when we want it, but we don't stop to think at all how and where that food was grown.

This fall and winter I look forward to embracing the seasonal vegetables more, slowing down and enjoying this magical season.

For more info check out this wonderful new book Full Moon Feast:Food and Hunger Connection

Art Hop Necklace

This is the necklace I made for the Burlington Art Hop. It was displayed at Woodbury's of Vermont

The focal point is a dichroic glass tearshaped pendant. It is surrounded by vintage looking sea green/blue and smaller blue glass beads. Strung on nylon coated stainless steel wire and finished off with sterling silver crimp beads and a sterling silver toggle clasp. The necklace is named after my mother.

It is available for sale in my shop

Enough is enough

One day - two gun incidents close to home.

1. In Montreal yesterday a gunman kils 1 and wounds 19 at a local college.

2. Same day right in my own neighborhood a 19 year old was shot in the leg in front of the local middle school which is only blocks from my home.

Enough is enough

I feel sad for this world.
I feel sad for our children.
I feel sad for the people who refuse to see that tougher gun laws are needed in this country.

"No thank you"

This weekend we took the family down to the Art Hop. We stopped in a small cafe to get some waters. I bought Enzo a lemonade and as I was paying for it I noticed some yummy looking chocolate chip cookies so I asked for one. I then asked Enzo if he wanted one also and he said "No thank you." The girl behind the counter said "did he just say he didn't want a cookie?" Yes I told her. She seemed shocked. I felt proud. My almost 5 year old has been raised to appreciate sweets as special treats and because of that he sometime just doesn't feel like having them instead of hoarding them every chance he gets.

I chalk this up to how we have raised him. We limited sugar and sugary foods until he was almost three and now when we have them they are a special treat. Oh he loves icecream, cake and cookies - don't get me wrong but he doesn't go crazy when he has then because I think he values them more than is addicted to them. More than often he wont even finish the portion of icecream or cake given to him. If fact the last time we had cake at a recent celebration I gave him a second helping and he ended up not finishing it because he said "I think I am done. I can feel the cake in body and I need to stop."

On the flip side my son who once ate anything and everything I put in front of him has become a very picky eater. I used to feel so proud that he grew up eating plain yogurt and not flavored, gobbled up tofu and veggies, rice cakes, hummus and soymilk. My sister used to ask me how I was able to get my kid to eat whole wheat bread and tahini and jelly sandwiches. Because that is all he knows I would tell her. Feed them well from the beginning and they will eat well. Feed them junk and that is all they will crave.

I shouldn't complain because in general Enzo does still eat like a dream. He loves fruit, yogurt, nuts, rice cakes, salad, cheese, crackers, soymilk and tofu. He has however become a bit more picky. Things have to be plain. Where I used to make lots of casserole type dishes in-order to pack the most mix of veggies and protein he now will not touch. Meals have to be plain and the food has to be separate. Tonight he told me "Mommy I can't always like everything you like." This comment brought back memories of me sitting at my parents kitchen table saying "everyone has different taste bud you know."

Raising vegetarian children has it's challenges but what is most important to me is the fact that we are raising them on as much "whole" food as possible. Even though Enzo is going through a picky phase I feel proud that he still has no idea what a fast food restaurant is. He helps me cook meals in our kitchen, he picks herbs from our garden to add to our meals, he is excited to help me compost our food scraps each night and recycle our cans and bottles. He is learning the responsibility we have to recycle and reuse. He has learned that there are days when his body just doesn't feel like having that chocolate chop cookie I just offered him.

Biking Rocks

For some reason it has taken me all summer to get on my bike. JB rides to work every day and takes the boys in the bike trailer on the weekends sometimes. We live very close to an amazing bike path that runs the length of our city along the lake. I think was has kept me away all summer was my headache and allergy issues. I simply have not had the energy or feeling of health to exercise. It is the reason why after 16 months of giving birth I still find myself more comfortable in some of my early maternity clothing. But when one wakes up each morning with a headache and fog that lasts the entire day it is hard to want to go outside and be active when I can barely get through my days with two kids.

Today however I made the choice to get on the bike. JB and I only have one car and he needed it today for an appointment. On Thursdays in our neighborhood is our weekly farmers market which I cannot miss so I decided to ride there instead. So after breakfast I thought I should go on a test ride first since I have never pulled the bike trailer before. So I saddled up the boys and off we went. We rode down my street to the bike path. We rode a few blocks and stopped a friend's house to say hello, then did a loop back to our house. We rode for about 30 minutes.


I felt free, alive and young. It was wonderful. I wondered the entire time why I had not done this sooner. Enzo loves the ride. Sal is still a bit young. He slumps over and is not super comfy in it so the rides have to stay short at this point. So now I am excited to take our afternoon ride to the farmers market this afternoon. For physical, emotional and environmental reasons - biking rocks.