Sunday, July 30, 2006

I'm a Lactivist

Lactivist= lactation activist

I can now officially call myself one. I was a part of a demonstration that was held in my town on Saturday in response to our City Council rejecting a resolution to become more involved in the support and education of breastfeeding in our city. We kicked off World Breastfeeding Week by gathering at the City Hall where there were information booths (I had a booth selling my goods), music and story time for the kids, speakers and a "breastfeeding cafe" where we sat around sharing stories and support. We ended the event by walking through town with banners and balloons. It was trilling. I feel so proud to get involved in such an important issue. We even made the lead story on the 6:00 news Saturday night.

You can read about it here

Breastfeeding Rally

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Bad mama poetry

I'm not at my best
the house is a mess
The floor needs mopping
but I feel like sobbing.
The leftovers are aging
my hormones are raging
These are the days I just want to run.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Burlington Council kills breast-feeding initiative

I am disgusted with the fact that where I live recently voted 7 to 6 that the city should not encourage mothers to nurse their babies.

Some councilors said it is not a "core mission" of the city.

I have written a letter in response to the paper. I have also written to my local city council Rep. If you are local you have a voice. Speak out against this stone age decision.

here is the link.

Burlington Council Kills breast-feeding initiative

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Dyring up

My milk is drying up. My tears are not. Sal has been weaning himself naturally over the past few months. In May he stopped nursing during the day and was only nursing before bed and first thing in the morning. Next the night time nursing stopped and as of last week the early morning session has stopped as well. It has been a little over a week since I have nursed him now.

Some of you might remember my headache situation. My neurologist thought it was hormone related and once I stopped weaning and my hormones leveled out the headaches might improve. This happened with my first child which is why they came to this conclusion. My headaches have been getting progressively better which is a good thing. I can't help feeling like I am stopping earlier than I would have liked though. But I can't beat myself up about it. I nursed him for 14 months. With my first child it was 15 months and he was also self weaned. Sal has not been begging for it or anything so the guilt is not coming from that at all. I think my sadness is stemming from the fact that I am realizing this might be the last time I nurse a child. I am not sure if I will have any more children.

On one hand I am happy to be getting my body back. I love nursing but I have had a heck of a time this second time around with it. I suffered from a nasty yeast infection in my breast for about 5 months. It was very painful but I pushed through it and continued nursing. So in a way, selfishly I am a bit glad we are done. Glad for my headaches which are getting better, glad that JB can not put him to bed without me having to sure and glad to be getting my body back for myself.

The other part of me though feels such sadness. I miss that time with him. I miss the closeness. I miss him needing me like that. I wonder if I will experience the feeling of nourishing another child in that way again. It means Sal is growing up and moving on which is a wonderful but bittersweet moment.

Time goes by so quickly. Children grow so quickly. As much as I embrace his changes and growth I can't help by want to hold on to my little baby. Have him hold on to me just a little bit longer.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Being grown up

Being grown up is hard. Being a mom is hard. I hit a slump this week. I knew staying home full time with my kids was not going to be easy but I have hit a wall and I need a break. This week the thought of getting up and making three breakfasts, three lunches and four dinners plus sweeping and doing dishes three times a day just makes me want to puke.

I need a bitch session so here it goes:

I need a vacation to break up the monotony of my days right now.
I need friends to hang out with during the week.
I need my kids to stop pulling on my clothes and sucking every ounce of energy I have left.
I am tired and worn and frazzled.
I feel like a frumpy mom for the first time ever.
I have lost myself. I have lost my style.
I can't lose my baby weight even though my baby is over a year old.
I sometimes wear the same pants several days in a row because they are so comfy and are the only things that fit me right now.
I don't get carded anymore when I go to by beer.
I can't get up early in the morning the way I used to.
I feel old.
I hate my clothes.
I hate my hair,
I hate my changing skin.
I hate my stretch marks. I hate my scars.
I love my kids but fuck is this hard.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Self Promotion - The Annemarie Necklace

The focal point of this summer sensation is a very large mother of pearl pendant measuring 70 X 90 mm. It is stunning. It is strung on silver plated stainless steel with lemon jade beads and two orange glass beads at the very end. I have finished it off with sterling silver crimp beads and a sterling silver toggle clasp.

Purple Elm Jewelry

Friday, July 07, 2006

"We don't eat chicken"

My friend Nuclear Mom inspired this post.

I have been a vegetarian for 14 years. JB is not one but since I do the majority of the cooking he eats that way at home. If we go out to eat or to a friend's house for dinner he will eat meat. I have no issues with him eating meat at all. We are raising both of our boys as veggies. I decided early on that when and if they decide to eat meat (I hope never) they can do so (maybe).

So up until this point Enzo knows we don't eat meat. He tells people we are vegetarians and will correct guests by telling them it is "soyroni" on our pizza not pepperoni. Up until this point though he hasn't realized that JB eats meat occasionally. We just don't usually call it out. Last weekend we were at a World Cup party and my friend was getting ready to start up the grill. She called out asking JB if he wanted a veggie burger or chicken. He replied chicken. Enzo's ears perked up and he said "We don't eat chicken". So we explained that sometimes Daddy does eat it. He was so intrigued he wanted to see what it looked like. It occurred to me at that moment that he had never seen meat before. His idea of a chicken exists in his books and he no idea what we meant when we said daddy was about to eat chicken.

When he actually say the cooked meat on the plate he looked less enthused. "That's chicken?" he said. That was that. He went on to get a plate of non meat food. Didn't even ask to try it (wiping brow).

I do want him to know where meat comes from. I don't want him to just see a package of meat at the supermarket and think it just comes from the store. Just as I believe it is important for children to be involved and understand gardening so they see where their veggies come from, I think it is also important for them to know that meat comes from an animal who is killed. Not that I am ready to tell him all of this now. I am just realizing that I need to dial my dialogue for when the big convo starts.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

gray day - nothing to say

I have nothing to say today so I thought I would just post two new pics of the boys. Enzo is being his sassy self and Sal is playing with his new wooden toys.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

DIY Yard Project

This was my first DIY project since buying our house in December. We have rented it for the past 4 years so it was very exciting to finally get my hands dirty and make some changes. We had a walkway into our backyard that was grass with walking stones. The stones were nice but covered mostly by grass and dirt. The ants decided to move in and built so many homes that the walkway looked more like a dirt track. Needless to say I was looking forward to trying something new.

My neighbors helped me with the idea of laying down pea stone instead of grass but using the existing walking stones. Since they were going to get more pea stone for their yard they also offered to let me go in on it with them since they had a truck. Sunday we ripped up the grass. Monday morning my neighbors left early to get the pea stone and Enzo and I put down the landscaping cloth and placed the walking stones in place. We then shoveled the pea stones into place and we had an instant transformation. The whole project cost me $10 because my neighbors provided me with the landscaping cloth and the edging so all I had to pay for was the pea stone.

I love it. Here are some pictures of the process.